Laugh of the day!

Discussion in 'Off Topic Forum' started by me just sayin, Sep 9, 2017.

  1. me just sayin

    me just sayin Silver Member

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    Deep In the back woods of Tennessee, a hillbilly’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, “Here. You hold this high so I can see what I am doing.” Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world.

    Whoa there, said the doctor, “Don’t be in such a rush to put that lantern down. I think there’s another one coming.” Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl. “Hold that lantern up, don’t set it down there’s another one!” said the doctor.

    Within a few minutes he had delivered a third baby.

    “No, don’t be in a hurry to put down that lantern, it seems there’s yet another one coming!” cried the doctor.

    The redneck scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, “You reckon it might be the light that’s attractin’ ’em?
     
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  2. redbert31

    redbert31 Diamond Member

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    Hahaha! I'm gonna send this to a family member who is a midwife in Florida. She will laugh her @$$ off

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  3. me just sayin

    me just sayin Silver Member

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    most likely she could use a laugh right about now because of Irma hope she enjoys it.
     
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  4. bkdodger

    bkdodger Super Moderator
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    I've updated the title similar to one of our other sister forums... Feel free to pop in a funny story or similar on the thread...

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  5. bkdodger

    bkdodger Super Moderator
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    Stole this one from our sister site..

    This for our smartwatch users here...

    [​IMG]

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  6. redbert31

    redbert31 Diamond Member

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    She and her fellow workers in the delivery room at her hospital in Clearwater, Fl. thank you!

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  7. me just sayin

    me just sayin Silver Member

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    so you hijack my thread :p seriously, no problem. I was wondering why this forum did not already have a thread for jokes.
     
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  8. Sajo

    Sajo Diamond Member

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    We do, several as a matter of fact. But they are all pretty old. So starting a new "joke of the day....make me laugh" type of thread seems like a good idea; instead of resurrecting an old thread from years ago or posting one joke at a time in seperate threads.

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    #8 Sajo, Sep 11, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 11, 2017
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  9. me just sayin

    me just sayin Silver Member

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    A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of the daughter’s swollen abdomen.

    It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say, “Gimme a break, lady! Your daughter is pregnant!”

    The mother turn red with fury, and she argued with the doctor that *her* daughter was a good girl, and would *never* compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy.

    The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon.

    The mother became enraged and screamed, “Quit looking out the window! Aren’t you paying attention to me?”

    “Yes, of course I am paying attention, ma’am. It’s just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they’d show up again, and help me figure out who got your daughter pregnant!”
     
    #9 me just sayin, Sep 12, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 12, 2017
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  10. bkdodger

    bkdodger Super Moderator
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    Safety right.... [​IMG]

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  11. redbert31

    redbert31 Diamond Member

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    That's a good one! I'll have to send it to one of my friends who likes to txt at the red stoplights! Thanks!

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  12. me just sayin

    me just sayin Silver Member

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    A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners on a bicycle, when he came upon a little boy trying to sell a lawnmower.

    “How much do you want for the mower?” asked the preacher.

    “I’m just trying to make enough money to buy a bicycle,” said the little boy.

    After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, “Will you take my bike in trade for it?”

    The boy said, “You got a deal.”

    The preacher took the mower and tried to start it. He pulled on the cord a few times with no response from the mower.

    The preacher called the little boy over and said, “I can’t get this mower to start.”

    The little boy said, “That’s ’cause you have to cuss at it to get it started.”

    The preacher said, “I’m a minister, and I can’t cuss. It’s been so long since I’ve been ‘saved’ that I don’t know if I even remember how to cuss.”

    The little boy looked at him with a smile and said, “Just keep pulling on that cord. It’ll come back to ya!”
     
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