Here is what I would do....
[email protected] on everyphone. Don't make it the "main" gmail with any of the phones. Make it your secondary google account.
Everyone can then get jorte calendar... great widget that shows the event on the widget, not just a highlighted date. Every phone can then add, viewand sync, as well as edit JUST that myfamilyname google account. but you can still have your personal gmail calendar only show up on your individual phone.
another way....
just go to your main google calendar online, create a family calendar, and just share it with all the gmail addy's you want to be able to view and edit it.
[email protected] makes a "family" calendar on his
[email protected]/calendar and shares it with
[email protected] (the main gmail of her droid)
[email protected] (the main gmail of his droid)
[email protected] (the main gmail on her droid)
all phones in my family plan share the same 'family' gmail address and settings are set so anything that gets posted on one calendar, shows up on the other phones calendar too. and both can edit the family one, but can not see my work calendar. They can also VIEW ONLY, my work and referree schedule. That way, they don't screw it up on accident, but know when I have something to do on a particular night. They can NOT view my work calendar where I have meetings at work, etc.