Who has the best..

Discussion in 'Off Topic Forum' started by Diordna, Jun 3, 2010.

  1. Diordna
    Offline

    Diordna New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2010
    Messages:
    1,342
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Cape Coral - FLORIDA
    Joke/ pickup lines? :)



    I guess I'll start off with the classic

    "Why can't Hellen Keller drive?"

    .."Cause she's a women"




    "A lion wouldn't cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood."
  2. VirtualGeek
    Offline

    VirtualGeek New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2009
    Messages:
    196
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    How does an eskimo build his house?













    He glues (igloos) it together!
  3. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
  4. Shadez
    Offline

    Shadez Super Mod/News Team Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2010
    Messages:
    8,448
    Likes Received:
    199
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Lafayette Hill, Pa
    Why is Helen Kellers Leg all yellow..


    Her dogs blind too..
  5. Darkseider
    Offline

    Darkseider New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2010
    Messages:
    1,866
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    That dress looks great on you! But it would look way better on the floor next to my bed. :icon_eek:
  6. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    *as you look at the tag on her shirt*

    "yep, just like I thought... made in Heaven!"
  7. Backnblack
    Offline

    Backnblack Premium Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    11,263
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Good thread, But let's keep it Family Friendly.....;)
  8. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    Well, Darkseider's pickup line could lead to a family, sooo.... :)
  9. etx_droid
    Offline

    etx_droid New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2010
    Messages:
    467
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Kilgore, TX
    Why does Snoop Dawg need an umbrella?


    Fo' Drizzle...
  10. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    oh that's good...
  11. DessoThumbs
    Offline

    DessoThumbs Member

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2010
    Messages:
    946
    Likes Received:
    7
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Location:
    NC
    OLD ONE HERE:

    "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
  12. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    Come to my 127.0.0.1 and I’ll give you sudo access.
  13. Diordna
    Offline

    Diordna New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2010
    Messages:
    1,342
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Cape Coral - FLORIDA
    Best joke yet! xD

    :icon_ banana:
  14. Diordna
    Offline

    Diordna New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2010
    Messages:
    1,342
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Cape Coral - FLORIDA
    I think we should make up our own Droid jokes haha
  15. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    *Cue Barry White Music and THIS guy's voice* (that video is totally clean, if you worry when you see the title... and quite funny)

    "Baby, if you allow me root access, I'll adb push my su to you and bring you some Simply Stunning Chaos. Then I can become your Succulent Desire.... and don't worry, I'm clocked to just the right frequency to make sure you don't Ultimately regret meeting me instead of somebody more Incredible. My name?.... well, some call me Woodyman, take that however you want to baby. But to those that know me the best, I'm simply known as ... 'The Shizzzz'... yeah that's right. What was that... a screen protector?! I ain't no iPhone baby, I haven't been in the pants of almost every girl out there. But you don't have anything to worry about, beautiful, b/c I'm Bugless. Cyanogen, baby, Cyanogen... What, you don't know what that means either? Well, you're in for a surprise, I'm told it's the hottest new lingo on the street... But that's why they call me 'The Shizzzzzz'... "
  16. verian
    Online

    verian Guest

    Now thats geek funny!!! Great joke. But when you tell it does it just loop back to let you know your NIC is working?
  17. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    nice!

    Well if it loops back, then my NIC is likely working JUST fine... ;)
  18. Diordna
    Offline

    Diordna New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2010
    Messages:
    1,342
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Cape Coral - FLORIDA
    lol some pretty funny lyrics
  19. Shadez
    Offline

    Shadez Super Mod/News Team Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2010
    Messages:
    8,448
    Likes Received:
    199
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Lafayette Hill, Pa
    Old one...

    Jackson was moving towards California. On his way to the city, he stopped at a local market and went to the washroom. The first stall was taken, so he went in the second stall.
    Soon, he heard a voice from the next stall... "Hi there, how is it going?"
    That was okay, but Jackson was not a person to strike conversations with strangers in washrooms on the side of the road.
    He did not know what to say, but he awkwardly said, "Not bad..."
    Then the voice said: "So, what are you doing?"
    Jackson thought that a bit weird, but said, "Well, I'm going back to California..."
    Then, he heard the person say: "Look I'll call you back. Every time I ask you a question, this idiot in the next stall answers me."
  20. jntdroid
    Offline

    jntdroid DF Super Moderator Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    6,437
    Likes Received:
    292
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    TX
    but a good one!