Pixel 2 set itself to battery saver--at 99%?!?!

Welcome to the wonderful world of Google. Resistance is futile, you will be assimilated. We will control all you think and say.

 

Wait! Where did that above post come from? I didn't write that! Oh no!!! It's happening!!! The machines are taking over!

It is pretty freaky that they have that much control.

 

One step closer to Skynet.

Sent from my Moto Z (2) using Tapatalk

 

CALLER:

Is this Gordon's Pizza?

GOOGLE:
No sir, it's Google Pizza.

CALLER:
I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.

GOOGLE:

No sir, Google bought Gordon’s Pizza last month.
CALLER:

OK. I would like to order a pizza.

GOOGLE:

Do you want your usual, sir?

CALLER:

My usual? You know me?

GOOGLE:

According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.

CALLER:

OK! That’s what I want.

GOOGLE:

May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?

CALLER:

What? I detest vegetables.

GOOGLE:

Your cholesterol is not good, sir.

CALLER:

How the heck do you know?

GOOGLE:

Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.

CALLER

Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.

GOOGLE

Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you only purchased a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.

CALLER:

I bought more from another drugstore.

GOOGLE:

That doesn’t show on your credit card statement

CALLER:

I paid in cash.

GOOGLE:

But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.

CALLER:

I have other sources of cash.

GOOGLE:

That doesn’t show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law.
CALLER:

WHAT THE HECK?

GOOGLE:
I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you

CALLER:

Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I'm going to an island without internet, cable TV, where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.

GOOGLE:

I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago.