As for the LEDs i dont think theres a way to turn them off. Theyre not that bright so i dont reaally have a problem with them, although for the texts and emails, you could just turn off the alerts for them and leave the ringtone or vibrate for calls on. You would still recieve texts/emails and get notifications for them, just no ring or vibration.
Check out the Sweet Dreams App. The app sounds like it applies to you. I have it but havent got time to use it & mess around with it. Let me know how it works out.