You've got to be kidding me...
I can only assume you never owned an Android device before the Tab and thus had some weird expectation gap.
I've loved the Android apps and way of doing things for a while on my phone, and the Tab really opens up a lot of those apps with good processing power and a fantastic screen.
The only detail beyond "I'm a ticked off jerk who is unsatisfied" is that you expected it to be like "some laptop computer" which comes off as someone complaining that a Porsche Boxter sucks at towing my big camper. Umm, ok. The only legitimate gripe I really see in the OP that doesn't smack of foolish and uninformed buyer is over the price point. Well, you pay a premium for new toys, always have. Buying a 360, PS3 console or BluRay player is dirt cheap now, but some people payed over the price of a tab for BluRay players that do what $90 models do now, but they had it early and got to use it. So, even that, any tech geeks who are early adopters should know is the way it goes. If you want to sell yours cheap, I'm sure one of us would take the "trash" off your hands.